Still having a hard time following Firo's line of logic, Rey only dignifies his answer with a scoff. Maybe in his own head it makes sense, but she has since resigned herself to the fact that this is likely one of those tired arguments that no one is going to win.

"I don't know why. I just know that everything feels a lot different now." She falls silent, mulling over the right words before she shakes her head and continues. "The old me wouldn't have had any trouble sabotaging our friendship a while ago, for one thing. And I realized that not being able to do so is one of the most selfish things I've ever done. Because the only reasons I stopped myself, other than seeing what it was doing to you, was also because I was afraid of what it would do to me, and I don't-- I don't think about things like that. Or, shouldn't, anyway. Didn't have the luxury of holding onto long-term relationships with people. Everything from all those old lives I've lived were just fleeting moments, and before I knew it they were gone. Now that I know about all the things that I'll never be able to get back, it hurts."

The worst part is that she can handle getting shot and blown up, but losing something that she can't just get replaced is a different sort of pain.